Childhood Ha Ha

July 29, 2010 By

She is the fourth in a family of five and shall be five years old in September.

It was her “turn” to come and visit Pappy and the pool and the candy store and– oh yes– the home made ice-cream shop.

We have incentives here at Chez Pappy besides the ol’girl herself.

She brought her Polly Pocket miniature plastic “dolls” (if dolls that look like showgirls can be called “dolls”)  but she was quick to tell me, “I brought the ones with clothes, Pappy.”   When I play with these fashionistas at her house, they are often in bathing suits or skirts that go up to their waist.  Pappy has been known to grumble about Polly Pockets shameful lack of attire and insistent state of blondeness.  She couldn’t bring any brunettes because there aren’t any period case closed.  There is a strawberry blonde, however.  When we play with them, she’ll often start the play by picking dolls (she picks first because she’s the boss) and after I pick mine, she’ll begin their dialogue by saying, “You are beautiful” to my doll.

My grumbling begins.

“I’m more than just a pretty face, you know,” I say back to her through my mini-skirted call-girl .  “I’ve had hard times.  That’s why I can’t afford dresses that go to the knee.”

She looks at me as in the above photo.  If I was holding a steaming turd, I swear to you she’d look the same way at me.  “What is your problem, Pappy?” as if ‘ I just told you were beautiful.  What else do you want in life?”

So, I’m not exactly totally malleable as you can see.   I need additional “visiting-incentives”.

The pool comes with occasional frogs and at least one mouse (see my You Tube movie if you simply have to see for yourself) and that totally makes up for my limitations as a play mate.  I also do not grumble in the water.

At the ice cream place, I let her get a “cone” instead of a dish which of course no parent in their right mind would do as it is a guaranteed waste of the ice cream as it either falls directly to the ground as it is waved around while telling a story  or melts in the July heat before three licks.

But, where I shine is as a flower and “omato” grower.  She likes to pick those “omatoes” and water the always thirsty flowers and her favorite vegetable is the Brussel Sprout plant which she pats like a dog but would not eat even if I held her Polly Pockets as ransom.

She watched me eat my braised Swiss Chard for dinner while holding her nose.  She didn’t like the smell as I’d braised the dark leafy fronds in garlic.  She has a very sensitive nose and could be used as canary in the mine if the world could afford to lose her which it most definitely can not so I just got up and took my dinner into my bedroom because she couldn’t eat her dinner of nuggets and noodles with one hand clamped on her nose.

She has popular songs running in her head 24/7.  Currently, she is singing a song by “Train” and a “Taylor Swift” song.  How do I know?  The lady in the next booth to ours at breakfast complimented her on her choice of songs as we got up to leave.  She said they were her favorite songs, too.  So, I asked her who sang them as I had no idea.

On the way home, we listened to some Beethoven and she seemed quiet and dreamy.  As soon as I turned it off, her singing soundtrack started up, “She doesn’t get you like I do”. La la la.

She asked me to put the radio to KISS 108 which on my dial is 107.9.  I grumbled.  If the station is 108 why is it 107.9 for God’s sake and on an on.

Immediately, she started singing along to another song.  Except this time, I knew the song as her twelve year old sister had pointed out this song a few weeks back on our return ride home from her visit.  It is by Rhianna and Enimem.  The words include “I love your lies” and “don’t mind if you tie me to a bed.”

Whaat?  Well, you can imagine Pappy’s reaction.

I went off like a heat-seeking missile to her twelve year old sister who just laughed and laughed and waited till I had crashed and burned (tangent wise not driving wise), calmed down,  and then said, “Yeah, but don’t you think she’s got a good voice, Pappy?”

So, as I listened to the four almost five year old singing every blasted word of this song, I held my nose in Pappy Protest.

I can drive with one hand on the wheel.

©Pat Coakley 2010

PHOTOGRAPHY CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION.

••Select photographs from this blog and my wider archive can be purchased or licensed at www.patcoakley.com

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Deep Thoughts, Family, Kids, Rants Tagged With: , ,

Awwww…..

August 14, 2009 By

nineyearsoldBeep.  Beep.

I interrupt the regular scheduled chapter in “Pat learns to photograph grown-ups “to bring you a message of utmost importance.

“Sweetness Kills” and must trump all other stated goals for a moment.

It goes like this.

I saw BonnieLuria’s new dog which is really masquerading as a lamb at the beginning of the week.    You should see this Cloud, too, click HERE.

First, “Awww…” and I’m not a goofy animal person as some of you know—Hollis are you listening?

Anyway, mid-week, my grand nephew came to visit and spend the night.  We went to two movies, back to back.  “Ice Age, Dawn of the Dinosaurs” and “G-Force”in 3-D, the latter a Jerry Bruckheimer “kids” movie.  Holy C.  “Incoming, Incoming” is all I can say about that movie.

In between shows, I suggested we go into “The Paper Store” and see if we can find a little back-to-school gift.  In we go, and I say to this nine year old, “You go look around and see if anything appeals to you.”

This is the same little guy who, after I had taken him to the Southwick Zoo last year, brought me to a 150 dollar stuffed dog for sale in the store.  I declined his request and pointed out that he had managed to locate the only animal we didn’t see at the Zoo.

There really isn’t all that much back-to-school stuff in The Paper Store  I found out, but there was a myriad of sports kitschy things, so I thought for sure he’d bring me to that corner.  Nope, he brings me to the Webkins carousel.  “Maybe this would be good for Mary, Pappy?”  (His little sister’s birthday is in two weeks) and shows me a few more stuffed animal suggestions for his other sister, Katie.

Then, he shows me a Boston Terrier Webkin and scratches its ear as he shows it to me.

He had just told me the story of sleeping over his cousin’s house the previous night and how their dog, a Boston Terrier, had slept on his bed, on his pillow– and I could clearly hear in his story that he was thrilled to have this little doggie on his pillow.  (Real dogs and cats are not coming to live at his house under any circumstances due to parental dictum.  Five kids was their concession to sentient beings in the house.)

So, needless to say, Boston Terrier Webkin was his back -to- school gift, along with one of those “Reserved Parking” signs for Bruins hockey fans that kids put on their room doors or adult sports neanderthals put on their den walls.

We get out of the store and we’re going to put everything in the car and then go to the movie and he says, “Pappy, can “Paws” (he’d already named the dog) go to the movies, too, in your bag??”

So, in he went….he zippered it up on both sides so just his little nose was sticking out.

When we got to the seats, he put him in the cup holder so he could see the 3D movie, complete with glasses.

When the movie started,  I had to point out that the dog was wearing MY 3-D glasses and he laughed and took off Paws’ glasses and gave them to me.

At times, during the movie, which was a true Jerry Bruckheimer explosion fest, he’d scratch the dog’s ears and feed him some popcorn and give him a sip of his drink.

Awww….number two.

The next morning (he slept with his arms wrapped around Paws, of course) we went swimming in the rain and found frogs in the pool and before I took him back home, I said, “Pappy has to photograph you and Paws!”

We went out to my back porch and I got out my best portrait lens, the 85mm, and there it was, the face of sweetness.

Kills me, I tell ya’.  Just kills me.

But not In that Jerry Bruckheimer explosions going off sorta way.

No, kills me softly like, well, like the touch of a lamb’s ear.

Aww…..Beep! Beeeeeeep!

Onward now with 50mm lens, girded loins, to photograph grown-ups.

Be sweeet, grown-ups, will you?

You were nine once. We all were.

Long ago and far away.

PHOTOGRAPHY CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

©Pat Coakley 2009

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Family, Humor, Kids, Personal Tagged With: , , , , ,

Why I’m Not A Children’s Photographer

August 11, 2009 By

nicholasshs

Kids are people, right?

(Sorry, Don, the lady doing leg lifts on her porch was gone by the time I made it out to the bushes)

Reason #1 I am not a children’s photographer:    I like silly faces.  I make them myself while I am shooting.

Reason #2 I am not a children’s photographer:    I’ll sacrifice sharp left eyeballs in order to get a dreamier background effect.

Reason #3 I am not a children’s photographer:    I would argue with the parent as to what photo to enlarge and wouldn’t sell them one I didn’t like.

©Pat Coakley 2009

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Singular Sensation-breaking photographic rules lowers your cholesterol: Tip#2

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Kids, Photography Tagged With: , ,

Miss Adorable

January 31, 2009 By

adorable1

Ok.  I officially give up.  I can master trains, trucks, speeding vehicles, ambulances, 18 wheelers– but a three year old in motion?

Fuhgetaboutit.

I cannot get this sweet thing in focus for the bloody life of me regardless of ISO or shutter speed, so I went for her shirt.  She is in constant motion singing, talking and jumping on and over me at any moment.

And, seriously, people.

If I were a parent, nothing would be in focus.  NOTHING.  How do parents do it?

I’m in awe, really.

©Pat Coakley 2009

Photographs Cannot Be Used Without Written Permission

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Kids, MOTION PHOTOGRAPHY Tagged With: , ,

Cartwheel in the Snow

December 21, 2008 By

122108librarygirl-01

IT IS STILL SNOWING, PEOPLE!

I have to go the christening of my latest grand nephew and since snow driving is a knot in the stomach experience, I’m looking for confidence where I can find it.

I found it this morning.  I am going to drive as confidently as this little girl does a cartwheel in the snow.  It is a sculpture out in front of my library.  As a life long reader and lover of books, it is the perfect artistic expression to go with a public library.  I enjoy looking at every time I go.

The artist’s name I don’t know but shall get and update this post.  It is a woman I know who lives in Rhode Island.  I don’t know whether she is still alive but, here, in this little girl’s freedom and joy, she is surely still around.

My favorite moment involving this statue happened actually a few weeks ago.  A little girl (around 4 years old) accompanied by her mother ran to the statue and got up on her tippy tippy toes to look down the girl’s dress to see if she was wearing underwear!

O, I know this sculptor would love this story and anyone who might read this as well!

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: ANXIETY, Creativity, Kids, nature, Photography, Seasons, STORMS, WEATHER Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Favorite Things

November 28, 2008 By

favoritethings-01

Yesterday, I had an idea for my five grand nieces and nephew.  I asked them to pick out their favorite “thing”  and photographed them holding it.  Years from now, I told them, when they have their own families, they can show their kids what their favorite thing was when they were 11, 8, 5, 3, and four months old.  Ok, I let the baby off the hook.

My eight year old grand nephew’s favorite thing is his elephant stuffed animal.  After I took the portrait shot outside his house, on the way inside, he decided to show me how elephants sound when they are riled up–he pushed his animal down his neck, turned and roared like a an elephant.  Then, he just hugged it and looked like an angel.

Although, I feel sure he’ll want the portrait of him roaring, one of my favorite things is this angelic eight year old elephant lover.   The power of the camera to capture sweetness never ceases to amaze me.

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Creativity, Kids, Life, Love, Personal, Photography, PORTRAITS Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Light and Darkness

November 15, 2008 By

mulitplelightsfinal

Venus is on my calendar today.  Yes, the one closest to the earth.  I’ve been thinking about it on and off since I was asked by an 8 year old boy to help him with his school project.

I looked it up on Google, of course.  Real color Venus is apparently white and goldy, as there is a thick swirling cloud cover over the entire planet.  He said he’d like to do a mock up of the planet.  OK.   I thought about putting a Styrofoam ball in glue and then rolling it in crystals.  So, I bought the crystals and the Styrofoam ball.

But, as I’m imagining how cool that would look, I thought about his face on other projects, and occasionally, his words, “Um, Pappy?  I don’t really want to make a dinosaur out of autumn leaves or out of almonds (they would have been the pointy armor, people!) and we had to come to another idea because the teacher seems to want the child to have the ideas.

So, I’m at the grocery store after a bad day all around when I totally wished I had someone to say, “You know Pat everything is going to be alright with the world” and, not just that, but this is key, someone to say it who I believed.  The older I get, the more often I have to make the case myself, sometimes from scratch, each day.  (Strong dark coffee is essential for this “Believe” project but illegal substances may be necessary in the future.)

So, I thinking my deep dark thoughts and slumped over the cart as if I was hauling Albert Camus’ stone on my back when I pass by the marshmallows.

“Marshmallows!  That’s it!  Venus made from marshmallows!” I thought.  Excellent cloud double and kids will love it.

Spring returned to my step and I took this photo on the way home at an intersection.

If he doesn’t like this idea, at least we can roast them over the gas burner while we’re doing HIS idea.

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: Crafts, Family, Humor, Kids, Life, Personal, Photography, The Single Life Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Minnie Pearl, age 3

September 24, 2008 By

©pat coakley 2008

I am babysitting today for Minnie Pearl, (not her real name, silly) age 3.  If the world goes to hell while I’m gone, I’m glad this is the last face I shall see.

She hugs my knees and looks up smiling and screeching (she is a loud one, I’ll admit) , “Paaaaaappppy, c’an wi color?”

Oh, yeah, we’re gonna color, Minnie girl, and go for a ride in your Hummer red wagon, (I am not kidding, we’ve come a long way from the little red wagon of my youth) and eat chips.

Oh, yes, we’ll pick up your sister from Kindergarten and go the library, too.  Then, we’ll play animals on the grounds of the lovely Endicott estate right near the library.  This game entails me sitting down (yea!) and I give orders of what animal I’d like brought to me immediately.

One bobcat, please.  Right now!

And, off they run to find the bobcat, which of course they do, and they bring it back on an imaginary leash and leave it to pant and slobber all over my legs.

They stand in front of me, eagerly awaiting their next mission.

Two giraffes, please.  Very tall.

Starbucks sorta thing, really, except you don’t wait as long for your order.

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: CHILDREN, Creativity, Family, Kids, Life, Personal, Photography Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Bottom of the Barrel

July 26, 2008 By

Seriously.

I had no idea.

None whatsoever.

This is a picture of the bottom of the barrel. No Photoshop. No tricks.

I was doing an art project with two kids that involved acrylic paints and using their hands as brushes. They had to wash their hands of the old color in order to smush them around in a new color. I emptied out the water at the end of the project and this is what I saw.

Unbelievable.

My goal now is to aspire to be at the bottom of the barrel.

First step toward my goal: Create a new series called, yes, you guessed it.

“I had no idea”

Have you ever used this phrase?

Tell us. Do. Better yet, show us. Have your people call my people. You know the drill.

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: 1, Art, blogging, Creativity, Humor, Kids, Random Tagged With: , , , ,

THE MORNING AFTER? SPIDERMAN LURKS

July 24, 2008 By

I’m not kidding.

I slept in my clothes.

A long night of torrential rains, biblical thunder and lightning and white caps on a sheltered cove had finally given way to only a continuing southwest gale. The sun was out. I opened my eyes and then the door.

Spiderman was lurking. Wondering. Waiting.

I need coffee I said to Spiderman.

And, my camera. I went back in and took it out.

Spiderman craned his neck to see what I was doing.

What Pappy always does, sweet spiderman.

Click.

©Pat Coakley 2008

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

Print Friendly
Filed Under: blogging, Family, Kids, Life, Personal Tagged With: , , , ,
«Older Posts